Back in the olden days when I read my news on paper, I would clip out Dear Abby columns and save them for when I needed a laugh, because really, there’s nothing more funny than a kid in distress, amiright? Unfortunately, many of the clippings were lost over the years, including the beginning of the letter from the kid who wanted to be from the 80′s real bad, as well as what I consider the best Dear Abby letter ever, which said, “Dear Abby, I have trouble skipping and hopping. I’m six.”
(the first part of this letter is missing but you get the point)
{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }
I think Wyatt Wolfe’s problems would be solved by learning to not be sexist. Also, you ARE only cool if you like rap, sorry.
There was a great Dear Abby where there were these two old ladies, one who was married and didn’t want to have sex anymore, and one who was single and horny, and they basically made a deal where the first lady’s husband would sleep with the second lady, if Dear Abby approved. There was no indication whatsoever that the husband had actually been consulted about this. It was the wife who was writing Dear Abby and she said “I’m not worried about my husband leaving me for my friend, because she’s ugly and can’t cook.” Abby thought it was a bad idea.
Hey! Where’s Abby’s response to Bitter in Portugal? I would love to know what she had to say to that little freak.
jfruh’s Dear Abby story is hilarious!
Don’t know too many 13 year olds who use “unrequited”. Just sayin’.
Pretty sure Bitter in Portugal is a character from a Marquez novel.
Wyatt sounds like he is really a 45 yr-old guidance counselor trying to appeal to tweens. Cause really, what 12 yr-old writes into Abby and includes their full name?
@Haley – “Cause really, what 12 yr-old writes into Abby and includes their full name?”
It’s not from Dear Abby. It’s from an article in the San Francisco Chronicle.