*In case you don’t know about science, here’s a little bit of it you can use to make lame excuses for your poor behavior:
The part of brain that is in charge of decision making, behavioral patterns, rationality, etc…is the prefrontal cortex. Scientists have discovered that this area of the brain doesn’t stop developing until your early 20′s, with age 25 being the generally accepted age at which your brain stops growing and begins its decline. I added that last part because I’m a pessimist. This finding supports one of my favorite prejudices made by Lisa Hanawalt when she claimed “not to trust the opinions or tastes of anyone under 25.”
So, if you’re 25 and under, an undeveloped prefrontal cortex is a good (albeit subjective) excuse for impulsive, bad decision making in your youth. Use it as much as you can because once you cross the line into real adulthood and you have to start accepting responsibility for your behavior, everything just becomes a fucking nightmare. Haha what am I even talking about? I just wish I didn’t have tattoos is all.
{ 19 comments… read them below or add one }
Hi Julia,
My son got his first tattoo years ago and it’s been a slowly developing work of art over the years (a tree w/leaves over his entire back). I’ve often thought of getting a tattoo or two myself. At my age, it’d be a non-impulse thing.
So what kind of tattoos you got?
Errol
I’m 27 and I still do stupid things.
I like how your mother knows the bank robbing essentials.
relax, you will appreciate them later, you are just going through another transition like puberty only its a mental ego-based period where you think that everything will be fine if you conform but it won’t be. You will always be weird and not a suburbanite clone-wife. Forget about the ‘growing up’ concept as getting a ‘real job’ is bullshit anyway, it sucks your soul out, you become co-dependent on the money and identity while your real identity will fade away and you will just want to buy things and watch tv and hate yourself as you get old. You may even think that getting married and having kids will help your despondency, or perhaps you might think you won’t have to work then you can lay around all day but you will get bored and hate the fact that you are trapped forever and ever and you will change, he will change and theres a 50% chance you will end up hating each other and try to steal each others money and pay despicable lawyers who laugh at your pain. You will always want to be the art chick rather than the boring lump with a little security.
haha whoa there, you took that in a crazy direction. I wasn’t talking about jobs or money or marriage or any of that stuff. And any insecurities I have are certainly do not stem from those issues. I suspect you’re either projecting, or you’re making a sweeping generalization about growing up because you have not. I suspect this of anyone who uses the phrase “sucks your soul out”
If you didn’t already read it, you should read the “Incognito : The Secret Lives of the Brain” by David Eagleman. After explaining that you aren’t in control and don’t have free will he points out that the same is true of criminals.
You know you can have tattoos removed right? Check out recent pics of Megan Fox. That Marilyn Monroe tattoo on her forearm is nearly gone…
Parents, gotta love ‘em! I have full tattooed sleeves and a full back piece. It took my Dad a little while, now he accepts them.
As far as respectable jobs, you can still get them. I met a guy who worked for Disney and he had full sleeves, he just wore long sleeve shirts. I work in a corporate environment and they don’t mind my tattoos. I roll my sleeves up and sometimes wear short sleeve shirts. I’m just the weird guy with the tattoos and piercings, but they still like me. It helps that I do a good job.
I can dig the buyer’s remorse; it’s like jewelry that you never, ever get to change.
That’s why I never got any tattoos, or smoked, or did any of those other youthful rebellious-but-actually-conformist things, because my prefrontal cortex was intellectually YEARS ahead of my peers (emotions, not so much). Now I’m 49, and still contemplating getting Popeye anchors on each forearm. Stupid, yes, but definitely not what all the youngs are doing, tattoo-wise.
Sound motherly advice. Yes, all mothers should know to teach their offspring proper bankheist attire.
Dont worry, I learned how to use a tattoo gun over here and when I get home I can cover up those hobo tattoos with butterflies! or butterfly dolphins. your choice.
The business suits of alternative culture.
I like your mom. She’s funny + so helpful! : )
I guess I should rethink my consumption of comics by Lisa Hanawalt, then.
What about tattoo removal?
Haha, to me, getting a tattoo is like hanging a picture on your wall, then going “yes…I want that to stay JUST as it is for the rest of my existence.” I have yet to find such a worthwhile picture.
I suppose getting tattooed is not suitable for everyone. To you Julia I would like to say : maybe you will learn to live with them, and see them as a reminder of what you were once, and are not anymore. To those who are like “oh getting tattooed is soooo stupid blablabla”, I’d say : maybe not for you, but it can be great for other people, don’t be too quick to judge those who dare.
I also have several shitty tattoos that I blame on drinking and sheer youthful impulse. One of these is “BONE DAWG” across my toes, which is actually a reference to one of my good friend’s male organ. Yeah.
But who cares, really? “Darren Daz Cox” took it to the extreme up there, and I’m not worried about any of what he said.
In today’s world, I don’t think that shitty tattoos can actually stop you from being a boring, tv-watching nine-to-fiver. I’m gonna have to do that myself.
I love world weary child/parent comics. They are the best.
I remember when I wanted tattoos. I even designed one. It was a cool design, but I’m glad I never did it.